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R I S E :iconutaayu:UTAAYU 0 0 Dragon Rose :iconutaayu:UTAAYU 2 0
Literature
60
Ever since I dreamed you were mine
I can't shake the feeling I will know
How your skin heals. How your eyes burn.
How your lips feel. And your heart warms.
Let me sink my face into your chest
Even if, only for a minute
Sixty seconds
Can change a life.
I knew I'd follow you home when
You dared to say, without reservation
How we'd wake up. How we'd make love.
How we'd spend. The day where we started.
See that's why I don't mind waking up
Even now, I'm living that moment
Sixty seconds
I spent in your arms.
Even if, you remain
Where I can't touch or taste or feel
I will follow you anywhere...
Even if, you become
A figment of my imagination
I will follow you anywhere...
I will follow you anywhere...
Let me sink my face into your chest
Even if, only for a minute
Let me sink my face into your chest
Even if, only for a minute
Sixty seconds
Can change a life.
I am counting down.
I am counting down.
:iconUTAAYU:UTAAYU
:iconutaayu:UTAAYU 1 0
Literature
Inside of Mine
Where were you when I needed you?
Where were you when I pretended to
wrap myself inside those arms?
Where were you when I needed to?
People say...
Something remembered
Can be brought back.
So this is me,
Coming back.
Because I've always been, inside your heart.
Because you've always been, inside of mine.
Who were we when we first met?
Who was I when you made me laugh?
Does it matter who I am or who I've been?
Where are you gonna take me next?
Cuz I say...
Damn the consequence
I wanna remember.
Holding your hand
As I fall.
Because you've always been, the one I've got.
Because I've always been, the one you have.
People say...
So many things but
Nothing matters.
When it's being,
Said each step.
But you only speak when, my heart has stopped.
And I only talk when, I hear yours start.
Because I've always been, inside your heart...
And you'll always be, inside of mine.
That is, the only,
Thing I have to say...
:iconUTAAYU:UTAAYU
:iconutaayu:UTAAYU 1 2
Literature
My Lips
It really doesn't matter
Where you sit or, where I lay my head now.
You and I can't pretend
We have anything in common...
A broken heart, doesn't count.
Even when now, explaining how it hurts,
Only kind words can leave my mouth;
How do I kill, who's not alive to start with.
My lips, won't even make a sound
My kiss, can't even bring them down
If that's, truly how, you wanna spend these last days of ours;
My lips, won't even make a sound
No wish, will ever hit the ground
If that's all you'll let me give, then that's all I have to give.
I want things to be different
Why'd you have to, prey on my innocence?
You go on playing games
I'm sitting this one out...
A broken heart, isn't a win.
Even right now, watching you play dumb,
Could the right words turn the odds?
Who do I kill, to get a prayer answered?
My lips, won't even make a sound
My kiss, can't even bring them down
If that's, all there is, why am I even trying now?
My lips, won't even make a sound
Your kiss, can't do a thing so
If tha
:iconUTAAYU:UTAAYU
:iconutaayu:UTAAYU 0 0
Literature
THE BLIND x THE BLIND
I've been keeping a secret
It's nestled somewhere - deep beneath my chest
I know you're afraid to look
That's why you always hit when you miss.
But I will only say this once,
then it's up to you to run...
I am not the reason, you're incapable of love.
Don't bother. I won't answer.
Let your friends continue to whisper, in your ear.
The blind and the blind
Could there be a better answer
to all my silly prayers?
I've been needing an answer
Even an answer - that cannot be "yes"
I know you're afraid of this
That's why you break my heart before yours.
But I won't not be swayed your way,
'cuz it's up to me to run...
You are not the reason, my life will change tonight.
Don't bother. Even trying.
By the time you know it's missing, I'll be gone.
Your heart's always mine.
Good luck finding another answer
to all your silly prayers
Today I miss us.
Tommorrow - no different.
But an answer's an answer.
I won't reject it.
Today I miss us.
Tommorrow - no different.
But a chance is a chance and
You've u
:iconUTAAYU:UTAAYU
:iconutaayu:UTAAYU 1 0
Literature
So Cry
I think I know how I will die... and I'm alright.
There are worse things
Fears that - eat you alive.
Hopes and dreams.
Deja vus.
Days that drag.
Swords that clash.
Necks that snap.
And hearts that fail...
I don't need to know, which one of those, hurts the most...
I think I know how I'ma die...
Let's not quantify.
We do it to ourselves. These silly little lives.
So tiny. So frail. The blink of an eye.
We do it to ourselves. Trying not to cry.
But that's no reason not to fight...
The curtain always falls.
Accepting what I can't... given time
Becomes a friend
How'd I ever live without?
A spotlight.
Hand to grab.
Hero or
World to fight.
A train ride.
A heart that's mine...
I don't need to know, which one of those, to resolve...
I don't think it matters anymore...
Love is love. So cry.
We do it to ourselves. These silly little lives.
So tiny. So frail. The blink of an eye.
We do it to ourselves. Trying not to cry.
But that's no reason not to fight...
The curtain always falls.
Don't you wan
:iconUTAAYU:UTAAYU
:iconutaayu:UTAAYU 0 0
Literature
Damage Done
Damage Done
Written by Johnny Clinn
Am I over my head? Or under my quota?
Is there a reason I'm still here? Waiting at home.
In the distant past, you'd've never put me
Behind the rest.
Where do I fit in? When will you be coming
back to what you call home?
Are you trying to tell me
something you assume, I don't know?
If that's the case. Don't waste your breath.
I can walk a thousand blocks
In a single step.
Maybe it is me? Maybe I am weak?
Maybe you can only love me on your terms;
In the distant past, that might've hurt more
What's that make me?
What will I become? When will your love make
a me I can't recognize.
Can you try and tell me
something that maybe, I know already?
The secrets make. Our time a waste.
And I can waste a thousand days
All by myself.
Perhaps it's in my skin. Something buried within.
Whether burnt or frozen through...
The love you bring - it's damage done.
Are you trying to tell me
something you assume, I don't know?
If that's the case. Don't waste your breath.
I ca
:iconUTAAYU:UTAAYU
:iconutaayu:UTAAYU 0 0
Literature
Changelings
I was supposed to escape;
Find a way to make this pain - dissipate.
But see in my haste,
I may have made a mistake...
The second of many. Not the last, surely.
But one I will, certainly, always, take with me.
Why must we break before we know we fit?
All I ever wanted was to be part of this:
A world, worth believing.
At no time did we, set out on this journey
Thinking we could be - any less.
You were supposed to love me;
Find a way, unconditionally - Lie to me.
But see in our haste,
It may have slipped away...
Not the first to see go. Not the last, surely.
But one I will, certainly, always, miss dearly.
Why must we break before we know we fit?
All I ever wanted was to be part of this.
What do you do?
When your future's locked in the past
Where do you go?
When you can't just go back home
When everything, inside of you...
rather break than be whole?
All I ever wanted was to be part of this:
A world, worth believing.
At no time did we, set out on this journey
Thinking we could be - any les
:iconUTAAYU:UTAAYU
:iconutaayu:UTAAYU 1 3
Literature
No Return
Do you swear!? Hands where I can see 'em.
Up in the air! Do you swear!?
You never meant to hurt me.
It's not the words flying from your mouth
It's the smile on your face. The hand behind your back.
It's the tiny things that hurt me the most.
You're right. I am different.
At home. In the car. Under a tree in the park.
I am only who I am
Becuz I can turn my head
Toward the coming storm.
I'd like to see you do that.
Come on. Show me you're strong.
That I'm indeed, the weak one.
Do you swear!? Hands where I can see 'em.
Up in the air! Do you swear!?
You wanna protect me.
It's not as easy as opening your mouth
Not a choice you make on the go. Not one you contemplate.
You either want to or you don't.
You're right. There's something missing.
At home. In the dark. Under the sheets. In your arms.
I am only what you want
Becuz should I turn my head
I'll bring on the storm.
I'd like to say you're different
Come on. I know better.
I am indeed, different.
So grab your sword and raise your shield!
O
:iconUTAAYU:UTAAYU
:iconutaayu:UTAAYU 0 0
Literature
Change direction.
I have to admit, I am guilty
With the past, behind us - it hurts.
The days have grown longer, since we last met
With that said, I bid you - farewell.
People often ask me
"Where will you... go from here?"
I say "Eh... I'll tell you when I get there."
I'm no longer on the run. I don't need a destination.
The past the present, the future can all
Collide and I won't...
Change direction.
If I had to guess, since I last left
You're different, I can tell - that much.
I often ask if
"Had I not... took that step...
Would you, have... been brave enough to chase?"
Even while on the run. I had no destination.
I'd pass the station, with no intention
Of ever slowing...
So you could catch me.
I'm willing to stop. Give me a reason.
I'm willing to stop. Make me see it.
Hear it in your voice. Feel it on your skin.
Make me notice - No doubt. No reason.
You in fact, have chosen...
A destination.
I'm no longer on the run. I don't need a destination.
The past the present, the future can all
Collide and I wo
:iconUTAAYU:UTAAYU
:iconutaayu:UTAAYU 0 3
Literature
Long After
I know what I'm doing - I've fallen before.
Broken each bone, holding me together.
I know it'll hurt me - What else is new?
I've lived this way, so long I'm, I'm okay.
I know that you tell me - your way; everyday
How much of me, you appreciate.
I know you say it - with every push...
Just sometimes, you push too, too hard.
But I'm afraid if I shout you'll just turn around...
And I've stood... enough rows behind
If that's the pause that makes you stop
Well then, by all means, stop.
But if you even, for a second,
dare to press, your hand against my chest...
Well then, tell me what you feel.
Tell me what you hear...
From my skin to yours.
I hope you realize
Maybe not tomorrow. Certainly not today.
I hope you realize
Inevitably. The days change.
The looks soon go and the highs they fade;
But I will always; Always... Be yours.
Long after they're gone... Long after they're gone...
Long after they're gone... Long after they're gone...
If that's the pause that makes you stop
Well then, by all m
:iconUTAAYU:UTAAYU
:iconutaayu:UTAAYU 0 0
Literature
Worn away
There's a word called "fearless"
Its significance - I'm not quite sure of
But there's another word out there
"Forgiveness"
That, I'm familiar with.
It may take me time.
Don't call me tomorrow.
But I wanna remember
Love is possible.
So let's keep the door shut
Only a little bit.
Let the light find its way
Across the floor.
I'll open my heart up to the
possibility - Love's...
not what I thought it was.
There's a time for second guesses
Its significance? Keep me protected
But there's only so high you can climb
With your arms
Wrapped tight around your waist?
I may be first to fall
Don't come after me.
I want you to remember
Love is possible.
So let's keep climbing up
One foot then the next.
Grab a hold if you slip
I'm always here.
I've opened my heart up to the
possibility - You're...
not who I thought you were.
Who do you think we'll be when we reach the top?
Who do you wanna be? What do you want from me?
What do you think we'll do when we reach the top?
What do you wanna make of what wha
:iconUTAAYU:UTAAYU
:iconutaayu:UTAAYU 0 0
Literature
You and Me
You and Me
Written by Johnny Clinn
Everything has its time: whether the sun, the stars
a marriage, a heart - a destiny lived.
I know it's time.
It just hurts... inside.
Nothing's weak. Nothing's strong.
Those are just words designed to disguise...
You from me. You from me.
Why does something right have to hurt so much?
Isn't it enough I hold my head up?
No one say a word
I'll keep my eyes ahead
Though I know
Sound travels...
In all directions.
You wrote the words: "Well you're changing your life"
I've never made a change - at least not by choice.
I know it's right.
It just hurts... sometimes.
No one's strong. No one's weak.
There's nothing you have to be ashamed of...
You hear me? You hear me?
Why does something right have to hurt so much?
Isn't it enough I hold my head up?
No one say a word
I'll keep my eyes ahead
Though I know
Sound travels...
In all directions.
So give me your hate! Give me your praise!
Give me your love! Let me hear goodbye!
Give me the chance you'll never have aga
:iconUTAAYU:UTAAYU
:iconutaayu:UTAAYU 0 0
Literature
Cross With Me
I've stopped at so many
Intersections
Just for a moment
Just to catch my breath
Or so I told myself.
What good is looking both ways if...
I don't look ahead when I'm finished?
What's there to be scared of?
I already have you.
I already won.
We're both gonna die someday - so let's keep
running til we can't feel
our legs anymore...
You look one way. I'll look the other.
I know you don't mean it
When you stumble
Pulling me with you
Pushing me away
Or so you coldly say.
Well push me all you want mister...
I'm not going anywhere. Deal with it!
There's nothing to be scared of!
You already have me.
You already won.
We both have to win someday - so why not
Catch a ride with me
I'll be waiting...
You look one way. I'll look the other.
When it's safe - tell me.
You look one way. I'll look the other.
If it's safe - Don't bother.
You look one way. I'll look the other.
Either way - Just cross with me.
What's there to be scared of?
I already have you.
I already won.
You already have me.
You already
:iconUTAAYU:UTAAYU
:iconutaayu:UTAAYU 0 0
Literature
the memories
In its silence - it really is almost deafening
In its disgust - it really is almost beautiful
I can hear a voice. I'm almost certain
It's someone I know; Someone I can't hate
Even if, every cell in my body
Tells me to break...
I and I, alone, tell myself what to say.
With this wish, I will make it.
With this wish, I will take it.
The punch the kicks
The laughs the cheers
The day I left
And the day you'll leave.
In its absence - it really is almost smothering
In its fracture - it really is almost perfect
I can hear a voice. I'm almost certain
It's a sound I know; One I know to trust
Even if, every soul around me
Tells me to run...
I and I, alone, tell myself who to love.
With that wish, I will make it.
With that wish, I will take it.
The day and night
The sun and stars
The way you leave
My heart in pieces.
I and I, alone, tell myself what to say.
I and I, alone, tell myself who to love.
This is my fault then... My fault then...
My fault becauz...!
With this wish, We will make it.
With t
:iconUTAAYU:UTAAYU
:iconutaayu:UTAAYU 0 0

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Activity


I stayed up til 5:30 am drawing. Well, actually, til about 4:45 - after which I rewarded myself by indulging in another chapter of The Hunger Games (sooooo good!). A lot happens in life. Detours. Distractions. But when you find something that's so quintessentially you, nothing should ever get in the way. I can't say I've been very good at standing my ground. Even to this day it's a push to get myself going. But once I start, I can't help but wonder why it took me forever to. Maybe I was just scared. And maybe I'll continue to be. But I know I have more energy now on seven hours of drawing and three hours of sleep than I've had in a long, long time. I think I've been running my engine on the wrong thing for a long while now.... No longer.
  • Listening to: "I'm Every Woman" by Whitney Houston

Journal History

deviantID

UTAAYU's Profile Picture
UTAAYU
Johnny Clinn
United States
I just try and turn my honest feelings into words, colors, shapes, or forms. It doesn't matter the medium - though I am awfully fond of poetry, prose, drawing (colored pencils and ink), animation & film, music & sound. One day I hope to call upon all those disciplines and create my own studio - specializing in storytelling of all kinds.
Interests

Comments


Add a Comment:
 
:iconverineking:
Verineking Featured By Owner Jan 14, 2013  Hobbyist Traditional Artist
Thanks for the watch^^
Reply
:iconthehauntedcolours:
TheHauntedColours Featured By Owner Aug 1, 2012  Hobbyist General Artist
thanx for the watch :) much appreciated.
Reply
:iconxanderlicious:
Xanderlicious Featured By Owner Jun 26, 2012  Student Traditional Artist
Thanks for the watch x3
I'm glad u like my work!
Reply
:iconutaayu:
UTAAYU Featured By Owner Jul 18, 2012
Thanks for the watch back :D
Reply
:iconthetruedarkness:
TheTrueDarkness Featured By Owner Feb 21, 2012
may I ask what your account name means?

I know the second half refers to Ayumi Hamasaki but what about the other one?
Reply
:iconutaayu:
UTAAYU Featured By Owner Mar 16, 2012
Sorry for the late reply. Haven't been on as frequently. I created my user name by combining my two biggest inspirations. First was, you guessed right, Ayumi Hamasaki :D The second was Utada Hikaru. Both changed my life and sparked my career, framing my early aesthetic values. And though I've expanded my pool of inspiration a lot since then, they both remain at the core of that :D
Reply
:iconthetruedarkness:
TheTrueDarkness Featured By Owner Mar 30, 2012
YES, I KNEW IT!

btw, did you know that I assembled her entire singles and albums discography on my profile made from the usernames of various deviations? check it out on the left below the featured deviation

it took me awhile to do it though but i think I got it
Reply
:icondiegoreales:
diegoreales Featured By Owner Sep 17, 2010
Thanks so much for the watch! :)
Reply
:iconkouki1:
kouki1 Featured By Owner Jul 2, 2010  Hobbyist Photographer
Thanks for the watch..:heart:
Reply
:iconweeladdie109:
weeladdie109 Featured By Owner Jun 29, 2010
Thank you so much for the favoritez! <3<3
Reply
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